Roald Dahl's Revolting Rhymes

A few weeks later, in the wood, I came across Miss Riding Hood. But what a change! No cloak of red, No silly hood upon her head. She said, "Hello, and do please note My lovely furry wolfskin coat."

The small girl smiles. One eyelid flickers. She whips a pistol from her knickers. She aims it at the creature's head And bang bang bang, she shoots him dead.

As soon as Wolf began to feel That he would like a decent meal, He went and knocked on Grandma's door. When Grandma opened it, she saw The sharp white teeth, the horrid grin, And Wolfie said, "May I come in?" Poor Grandmamma was terrified, "He's going to eat me up!" she cried. And she was absolutely right. He ate her up in one big bite. But Grandmamma was small and tough, And Wolfie wailed, "That's not enough! I haven't yet begun to feel That I have had a decent meal!"