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Maybe we`re not as fancy as Senator Ryman`s pet blog team, but what we lack in prestige, we more than make up for with viciousness.

It makes it easier to keep smiling for the cameras if I don`t remember how many people want to kill me.

It`s never someone else`s war. As soon as the place where you stand becomes part of the battlefield, the war belongs to you.

The reassuring feeling lasted only for as long as it took my eyes to find Audrey and Ben at the back of the crowd that was groing on the garden`s edge. He looked terrified. She looked resigned, like this was something she had long since come to terms with. I wasn`t sure which was worse; the thought that I was about to break his heart, or the fact that I had apparently broken hers so long ago that she no longer felt the need to weep for me.

We are a safe harbor of blessed madness in this wonderland of excessive sanity.

She never stops. She`s like the Energizer Bunny of being a pain in the ass.

The thing about the past is in the name: It`s the past. It may shape us. It may inform us. It may be the foundation on which we are built. But it`s dead. Leave it in the grave, and live for the living.

I worry about you. I love you a lot. I`m not going to start protecting you from yourself. That isn`t my job.

People say money doesn`t fix everything, but I`m looking forward to proving them wrong.

Sunday mornings are my private time. I`m allowed to spend them however I like, providing nothing is on fire.

This is definitely weird, however. On the scale of one to 'alligators in the basements', I feel like we`re trending closer to 'alligators' than anything else.

As if on cue, there was a knock at the bathroom door. "You decent?" called Audrey. "You said I was pretty damn good last night," I called back. "If I`ve been downgraded to 'decent', we`re going to have words."

"If you gentlemen would let me get to the stairs, I`ll be heading for my room to change and decontaminate," I said, as mildly as I could. "I do that better when no one`s aiming a gun at me. Not sure where that quirk came from, but there it is."

Being reasonable doesn`t make a thing true. Sadly.

Call me selfish if the label seems to fit, but I`ve had more than enough of people making my decisions for me and pretending that those choices were the right ones.

The house we shared was technically big enough for eight if we went by the number of bedrooms available, and not by how many people we could stand sharing living space with. Despite that, there were only three bathrooms, which was a large parts of what defined our normal cap. It was hard to like anyone very much when they were between me and the vital necessity of peeing.

He looked at zombies and saw a walking metaphor for man`s inhumanity to man. I saw zombies. I liked it that way.