Love Is the Higher Law

The movie starts, and Liza Minnelli’s in pre-Nazi Germany, and it’s a little weird because everyone seems to think she’s amazing, but really she’s not that attractive, but I’m afraid of saying anything, because for all I know, Liza Minnelli is Jasper’s favorite actress ever, and even though I’m pretty new at this, I know that coming between a gay boy and his diva is a very serious offense.

At first I thought, I’m totally going to fail this, because I had no idea what my blood type was. I didn’t even know what the options were, except for type O negative, because that was the name of a band. “Does blood type correspond to personality?” I asked Amanda. “Like, if I’m a type A personality…” “Or type A asshole?” “Point taken.” Type B bitch.