Ted Bundy: Conversations with a killer

HA: <...> You've commented on how wrong some people have been in describing Ted Bundy. Yet they've generally only interpreted what you've promoted via your behaviour.
You give people a feeling of being very cold, calculating, mocking. Cold hearted, very methodical. I think that at one time you probably hid behind this kind of facade; it was needed by you when you didn't feel like you were a part of things and so on.
<...>
TB: No, you haven't been soliciting my... soliciting me in that way. I mean it's just... I mean to say, "Well gee, why doesn't Hugh ever give me a detailed rundown on his childhood and his family life? What his kids are like? And his home? Is he cold? Is he calculating?" That's not it at all. That's not our goal here - to be, you know, long-lost...
HA: I'd tell you all that if you asked me, though.
TB: Yeah.
HA: But there's no reason for it to be that way.
TB: There's no reason for me to inquire into your love life or your domestic affairs. And yet, if I don't do that, people say, "Well, he's cold and distant."

You asked about my mood swings. I'm very aware of them myself. Maybe it's not quite accurate to use the term "mood swings", but it is hard for me to understand what happens. That is, to anticipate them or look back and try to determine some pattern. I’ve been able to make neither rhyme nor reason out of what happens.

It’s not dictated by the cycles of the moon or anything else I’m aware of. And again, perhaps the phraseology ‘mood swings’ isn’t accurate. It’s just changes. It’s harder than hell to describe, but all I want to do is lay (sic) around. I’m not motivated to do anything! I just consume huge volumes of time, really, without doing a thing.

I’m not particularly depressed. There’s just no momentum. There’s no desire to do anything. It’s just blaaah! It cannot be characterized by depression or deep sadness.

I don’t dwell on sad things — but I sure as hell could! I don’t dwell on the heartache. I do dwell on the nicer things. Even on those lackadaisical periods, I’m capable of being genuinely cheerful and gregarious. At least, for a limited period of time. Whatever the situation calls for. Then, (just) as quickly, I’ll slip back into the pattern of just vegetating. It became part of my character, my facade, that I would conceal these periods of inactivity, as it were. it’s really a combination of being inactive, with no motivation or direction. I became an expert at projecting something very different. That I was very busy. It is clear now, I think, that a huge part of my life was hidden from everyone — secret, as it were. It didn’t take much effort at all.